The first week of the month has become a dreaded one for me. Because for the past 2+ years that I've been off birth control, the first week of the month has brought the news that I am, once again, not pregnant. (I have a 31 day cycle instead of a 28 day one, so my period stays pretty much in the same place on the calendar every month)
It seems like literally everyone surrounding me is pregnant or just had a baby. I've been to so many baby showers in the last 6 months it's ridiculous. So many babies. WHERE THE HELL IS MINE?!??
I turned 35 in May. I know I'm running out of time. The metaphorical clock is ticking.
I've always wanted to be a mother. I (humbly) think I'd be pretty good at it. I know Anthony would be a good dad. Plus, he's an only child (and a III, so EVEN MORE pressure to carry on the name). And I'm letting him down every month. He would never say so, and he's been more than supportive, but I know....
I guess it's time to start looking at possible fertility treatments and/or adoption.
Jessica, I will keep you in my prayers! I have many friends who have fertility issues, so I have seen how difficult it can be! Just remember, we are ALWAYS here for you! please feel free to vent whenever you need it! BIG HUGS!
ReplyDeleteHey girl - i'm so sorry. I remember when we were trying. The thing that seemed to work for me was losing weight. You will get your baby. I know it!
ReplyDeleteOh Jessica, I just love you to pieces! I was told I would never have any kids & I planned accordingly by getting a dog. As I sat up in the NICU today I thought about the handful of my very special friends with fertility issues & the struggles each and every one of you face and emotionally deal with. I am sure its overwhelming to say the least.
ReplyDeleteYour husband sounds & I'm sure is amazing. I would send him walking through the military uranium field my husband wasn't suppose to be walking through to share the love of the things they tell you you'll forget if I knew it would work.
You are a wonderful mother, even if you don't have baby lV here yet. I don't know what I would have done without you in TX. I'll say extra posters for you that you can have that bodily shake up to get the baby juices a flowing (yes, I am heavily pain medicated so I'm hoping some of that came out right)
Just wanted to let you know that I am praying for you and God will provide when the time is right. :)
ReplyDeleteI hear everything you're saying. I went through 2 miscarriages and 2.5 years of trying after with frustration and crying. I went to get help. I went to the clinic and that was the best thing I could of done. My insurance didn't cover the treatment, but I felt all the things you're feeling now, so I talked to the family and they helped us. It is anything but romantic, but it did the job.
ReplyDeleteI am wishing you the best of luck
Aww, Jessica! It'll happen - I'm sure that a fertility specialist will be able to help you guys make it happen, and you'll be amazing parents. You're in my thoughts!
ReplyDeleteBig HUGS beautiful. I don't know what to say. You are kind, generous, and warm. I know this about you IRL. I am sending love and hope your way.
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